Journal

Journal

My New Friend Sucks

My new friend is not a person, but it is something that I’m close to and will, hopefully, enrich my life.  My new friend is a Wound Vac.  I mentioned in the previous journal entry.  Here I am wearing my new friend.  The actual vac looks like the one from the last post.  I need to wear it 24/7 for at least 2 weeks. My visiting nurse will be here on Monday to change the filter and dressing.  The tube runs…

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Current Wounds

Quick follow up on the previous Journal entry.  To be honest, I’m not really sure why I’m showing you this.  Maybe it’s self pity, or just being thorough.   Regardless.  I’m currently packing the top and bottom wounds.  They are about 1.5″ deep.  The wound in the center is more superficial and doesn’t require packing.  I thought about adding a second picture showing the packing, but I decided not.  Here you go:

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Health Update (unhappy face)

I don’t remember if I talked about my journey with wounds.  If I did and you read it, sorry, move to the next paragraph.  I had my “final” surgery to close up the hernia on my abdomen last June.  The hernia was the result of opening my stomach to remove 9 or 10 liters of liquid that had built up and was crushing my internal organs.  In August, I notice what looked like a small volcano, lava top and all,…

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Why No Updates

It’s been quite a while since I’ve updated this site.  I’ve been doing other things.  One of the last updates was to add a couple of quick poems.  That led me deciding to put the poems to music.  Sounds simple enough.  Except that I don’t really play and instruments, can’t read music and no idea what it takes to write a song.  No problem.  I’ll just learn. I started to learn acoustic guitar about 10-15 years ago. I quickly realized…

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Coping has been a challenge

Coping has been a challenge.  I’m approaching a year since leaving hospital after having “lived” there for almost 6 months.  My last surgery was in June, 8 months ago.  Parts of my life will never be the same.  Eating a hand full of Creon each day to supplement the 90% loss of my Pancreas, not able to drink a glass of wine to relax, something I need now more than ever.   Needing to avoid some of my favorite foods or…

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Somebody Stole My Suppositories

We came home and found my mother beside herself.  Since she’s lived with us (and apparently before as well), she’s been very concerned about her “regularity”. In fact, the first night in our home, she complained and I went out and bought her a pack of suppositories.   Apparently, and thankfully,  they worked well.  Considering her vision, I was concerned about them simply lying on the bathroom vanity, so I put them in the closet.  She hasn’t needed them since.  Until the…

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Eye in my soup

Yesterday after lunch, we were sitting in the living room and mom says, “Did you put an eye in my soup?”  Huh?  “It was round with a round part in the middle, it looked like an eye.  No, we assured her, we didn’t put an eye in your soup.  “I never want that soup again.”.  “There were slimy things in it. I couldn’t eat it without using a whole bunch of oyster crackers.”  Never again. Just as the evening before,…

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Roller Coaster

My ride on my emotional Roller Coaster has continued.  Some days I feel normal, like I did most of my life.  Other days I feel like life is great and can’t wait to experience what the day presents.  But other days, like today, I have a hard time not crying.  Yeah, a roller coaster. Nothing has fundamentally changed from yesterday.  The things that complicate my life are the same.  The things I like haven’t changed either.  It’s a matter of…

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TV Not Necessary

She stared intently at the TV.  “Come on come on come on”, she said.  “Give him the car” was next.  We were watching the The Crown.  I’m not sure what Mom was watching.  I believe it was a game show.  We turned off the sound.  That didn’t deter her, repeating “Come on come on come on”. Finally, we turned the TV off.  TV Not Necessary.  Even with a blank screen, Mom was engrossed in a show only shown in her…

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Why I Survived

After coming home from the hospital, I never thought of why I survived?  My wife, however, would often tell me, “you lived for a reason”. Okay, was typically my response.   When I finally was well enough, I went back to church where others would come up to me, welcome me back and say at some point, “You survived for a reason”.  Often, I could only manage a smile, not even the “okay”.   Implied within the statement was that God saved me…

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